Until two days ago, I was writing this blog anonymously. For some unfathomable reason, a few days ago, I decided I was ready to share my secret blogging world with the real people in my life on Facebook.
To my surprise, people not only read the post I shared but also went back through my entire site and read posts from more than two years ago when I started the blog! I know this because they quoted my own words back to me! When I stripped off the layers of anonymity, I may as well have taken off all my clothes in the bread isle of Kroger and placed them on the shelf beside the sub rolls and went strutting through the store as naked as the day I was born.
The good news: My WordPress stats went crazy. Several hundred people viewed my site over a two day period. That’s considerably more than I usually receive as I’ve, primarily, used the blog as an outlet for grief, frustration and creativity. The bad news: Several hundred people — that I know — viewed my site. They could see right into my psyche.
When I realized people were reading some of my older posts, I found myself going back through old blogs and wondering what this person or that person would think, reading my own words with a new censor, and having an acute desire to pull the blinds and take cover. I wondered how long it would take for someone to tell my mother.
Thankfully, the responses were very positive, overwhelmingly so, and most of my Facebook friends aren’t WordPress users, so I can put my anonymity back on and go about writing without internal censors going off. However, I have a newfound appreciation for the armor we put on in our daily lives. Although it may not be entirely honest, I have learned that the armor is necessary, at least, during certain times in our lives, but being real and raw has it’s place and time as well.
Maybe, one day I will sync my WordPress and Facebook accounts and go strolling down the proverbial grocery store isle naked, but it won’t be this day!